March Mascot
A Mascot Battle Royal, by Dilo Capo

Archive for March, 2007

No. 12 Arkansas Razorbacks vs. No. 5 USC Trojans

March 15, 2007

EAST RUTHERFORD REGION 
9:45 PM ET  No. 12 Arkansas Razorbacks at No. 5 USC Trojans
I’m getting tired, so this is how I’m going to end Round One: “I’m gonna bleed you like a stuck pig.”  Edge: USC Trojans

No. 13 New Mexico State Aggies vs. No. 4 Texas Longhorns

March 15, 2007

 EAST RUTHERFORD REGION7:25 PM ET  No. 13 New Mexico State Aggies at No. 4 Texas Longhorns
It seems like every other mascot that I research makes me shake my head in disbelief.  I want to go on the record right now saying that The Greatest Generation gave birth to The Worst Generation.  The Baby Boomers are [...]

No. 13 Holy Cross Crusaders vs. No. 4 Southern Illinois Salukis

March 15, 2007

SAN JOSE REGION
9:30 PM ET  No. 13 Holy Cross Crusaders at No. 4 Southern Illinois Salukis
To answer everyone’s question, a Saluki is a breed of dog that is a member of the sighthound family.  This means that they hunt by sight, not scent (creative name! Opium mustn’t have hit the mainstream yet).  It’s an extremely [...]

No. 9 Villanova Wildcats vs. No. 8 Kentucky Wildcats

March 15, 2007

 SAN JOSE REGION
9:30 PM ET  No. 9 Villanova Wildcats at No. 8 Kentucky Wildcats
    VS.   
What do you think?  I think whoever designed UK’s mascot should be fired.  Nova moves on! Edge: Villanova Wildcats

No. 12 Illinois Fighting Illini vs. No. 5 Virginia Tech Hokies

March 15, 2007

SAN JOSE REGION
7:10 PM ET  No. 12 Illinois Fighting Illini at No. 5 Virginia Tech Hokies
At this time, I’d like to turn serious for a moment.  I’ve made a lot of tongue-and-cheek comments today, some of those may be insulting to certain people.  But now I’d like to recognize a moment of silence in memory [...]

No. 9 Purdue Boilermakers vs. No. 8 Arizona Wildcats

March 15, 2007

 ST. LOUIS REGION7:20 PM ET  No. 9 Purdue Boilermakers at No. 8 Arizona Wildcats
This match up does nothing for me.  A Boilermaker is a trained craftsman who produces steel fabrications.  The name comes from manufacturers who would fabricate boilers. Seabass made it sound so much cooler.
Wildcats are wildcats; we’ve covered that.  Honestly, I can’t ever [...]

No. 14 Miami (OH) Red Hawks vs. No. 3 Oregon Ducks

March 15, 2007

 ST. LOUIS REGION4:55 PM ET  No. 14 Miami (OH) Red Hawks at No. 3 Oregon Ducks
I did mention this before, but this is absolutely a true story.  Senior year of college, we lived in a dorm called the Mods that had a shared backyard  During Springtime, two ducks began nesting in our backyard.  One appeared [...]

No. 11 Winthrop Eagles vs. No. 6 Notre Dame Fighting Irish

March 15, 2007

 ST. LOUIS REGION2:35 PM ET  No. 11 Winthrop Eagles at No. 6 Notre Dame Fighting Irish
ND always has trouble with those damned Eagles.  But this is a different opponent.  These eagles have come into the tournament as a cocky, elitist bunch, having been given their highest ever NCAA seed.  But they are forgetting one [...]

No. 10 Georgia Tech Yellow Jackets vs. No. 7 UNLV Runnin’ Rebels

March 15, 2007

 ST. LOUIS REGION
12:25 PM ET  No. 10 Georgia Tech Yellow Jackets at No. 7 UNLV Runnin’ Rebels
I freaking hate bees.  When I was 8, I drove my big wheel right into an underground nest of yellow jackets and they stung the bee-jesus out of me (cue the laugh track).  20 something stings in all. I [...]

No. 10 Creighton Blue Jays vs. No. 7 Nevada Wolf Pack

March 15, 2007

SAN ANTONIO REGION2:50 PM ET  No. 10 Creighton Blue Jays at No. 7 Nevada Wolf Pack
Blue Jays sure are purtty, but I don’t think that will help them against a pack of wolves.  The bright blue feathers don’t exactly act as a camouflage.
But blue birds make me think of Zip-ah-dee-do-dah.  Zip-ah-dee-do-dah makes me think [...]